Profe! Dani se tira un pedo!!!!

I got a little behind with this and now I feel somewhat overwhelmed. A lot happens in ten days. I have lots to say about the great places I’ve been here and people I’ve met, but in this post let me tell you about the kids I teach (easily the best part of working here).

I teach Infantil (4 years old) just one class per week, but oh my goodness is it fun. I work with Josefina who is tough as a whip and also the Vice Principal of the school. I LOVE all the routines they do in the morning. Of course there is the standard, “What day is today?” “What’s the weather like today?” But there are also some fantastic songs which the kids sing like rock stars. “Good morning, good morning, good morning, how are YOU (and they point)? I’m fiiiine. I’m fiiiine. I’m fine. Thank. You. (and a thumbs up). What in life could possibly be better?

I teach Primeros (5 or 6 years old) about four times a week - two classes for Primero A and two for Primero B. Naturally I love them because they're so small and adorable. But I also find that they leave me completely exhausted. I sort of like the fact that they can’t speak much English because they speak to me almost completely in Spanish which is nice listening practice. It’s also amazing to me that the Primero A class can be so well-behaved while the Primero B’s appear to be on a sugar high 24/7. Visi is the head teacher of Primeros and she is very different from Marta (just wait, I’ll tell you about her). Visi’s sweeter, kinder, more like how you probably remember your kindergarten teacher. But she also doesn’t have quite the same control that Marta has.

Last week in Primero B the kids worked on a project taking drawings of various school supplies and making a mosaic of sorts using paper, scissors to make the paper into small scraps, and glue. And we’re not talking about the super-frustrating, worthless, plastic scissors we give our overly-protected children in the US. These are some serious blades, which naturally makes me a worried wreck. Then throw in gluesticks and millions of tiny scraps of colored paper and you’ve got yourself one crazy mess. In addition to this already stressful situation, add the fact that the kids are split into groups of five and told to “share” two scissors and two gluesticks. Share? Give me a break. Share=Warfare. I pretty much spent the hour walking from group to group and acting as mediator, negotiating peace treaties in the Scissors Battle of 2008. Of course, all of this tearful complaining to me, “profe”, is happening in Spanish. And all of my calm explanations that indeed, you will get the scissors after Sylvia but for now why don’t you glue, are happening in English. At times like these it is hard for me not to laugh at the sheer craziness of it all.

I teach Segundos (so about 7 years old) about 8 times each week. Marta is the head teacher who I help in Segundos and Quintos. At first, I was a little shocked by how tough Marta is with them. The kids have all kinds of pencil bags (estuches) and pencils (lápices) and sharpeners (sacapuntas) and empty yogurt cups to catch the shavings of their pencils and various other crap scattered across their desks. These things really serve no purpose except to give the kids something to mess with all day instead of pay attention, and to simultaneously drive Marta insane. I think my first day Marta turned to me and said quietly, "I'm sorry, but I have to tell them this in Spanish. It's important and I need them to understand." She then began to RANT in Spanish about how she wants ONE pencil bag on the desk and NO markers and a pencil sharpener that CATCHES the shavings. Pencil bags are for holding your pencils and NOT for hitting the person next to you on the head. And NO more yogurt cups. She then took one of the little empty yogurt cups off one of the desks and threw it on the ground and stepped on it. WOW, I thought. So this is why Spanish people grow up to be cold, hard, all business, no nonsense, scary people. No wonder the Spanish woman at the consulate made me cry. She obviously went to public schools in Madrid. But the more time I spend with the children the more I see that Marta's toughness might be necessary.... and working. By the time these kids are Quintos (10 years old) they are some extremely well-behaved and intelligent students. In fact, I've even started to notice my normally softy self being a disciplinarian. I'm not shy about snatching objects off desks or catching a kid in the act of goofing off and yelling, "Alejandro!!!" Maybe it's good I'm toughening up before I become an attorney!

The Segundos, while having the occasional behavioral problems (they are 7 for crying out loud) are by in large very sweet kids. They are still at that age where they're excited to learn new things and they like to sing songs and play games. Today we played Simon Says which was a riot. Of course I was Simon. They're learning parts of the body so it was perfect. "Simon says touch your elbow." Half of them touched their shoulders. "Simon says touch your ankles." Half of them touched their knees. Then Marta whispered, "Tell them to touch their tibias." And I whispered back, "I don't know where that is!" Haha so I guess it was a good learning experience for me, too.

I teach the Quintos (10 or 11 years old) about five times a week. I really like this class because they are the product and the reward of all the suffering with Infantil, Primero, and Segundo (not to mention Tercero and Cuarto which I don’t teach). They are, for the most part, very well behaved and their English is pretty strong. They speak enough that almost the whole class is in English. Their writing isn’t great, but most 10 year olds aren’t great writers in any language. It’s also interesting to see them becoming “pre-teens” and how different they are from the younger kids. One day we were talking about friends and what it meant to be a good friend. Marta said that part of being a good friend was keeping secrets. She then asked the class, “Is Pablo a good friend? Does he keep secrets?” Everyone nodded their heads. “What about Adriana? Is she a good friend?” Again, agreement. “And Guillermo? What about him?” A couple of hands shot up. “Well, Guillermo told me on the playground what Sergio said about Daniel liking Rosa so I don’t think that’s a good friend.” I thought this whole thing was a little weird and uncomfortable (although hilarious), but leave it to Spanish people to have a straight-to-the-point conversation full of finger pointing and leave with no hard feelings.

I would be lying if I said I didn’t have favorites. I TOTALLY have favorites. But I’m pretty good at keeping it under wraps. Or at least I think I am.

In Infantil it’s hard to pick a favorite because I see them so infrequently.

In Primeros, hands down Andreis is my favorite. Andreis appeared in my last blog entry here. He is the “Háblame en español!” boy. It’s funny that he’s my favorite, because Visi can’t stand him. Admittedly, he’s not very well behaved. And he speaks zero English and has zero desire to learn any. But I love him because he picks up on things the other kids don’t. Plus he’s a smart-alec while still being sweet. For example, during the scissor fiasco he called me over, took my hand, and said sadly in very quick Spanish, “No one will let me use the scissors and I haven’t gotten to cut and I really want to.” So I said to him in English, “Ok, well you’ll get the scissors next but look at all these scraps. Why don’t you glue them?” He grinned and said in Spanish, “You understand Spanish, so speak in Spanish.” I smiled and said, “No.” He responded, “See, you just did!” Hahaha. Wow, tricky.

In Segundos, I’m going to have to say I have two favorites. The first is Selma. She is light-skinned black, blondish curly hair, HUGE brown eyes and very long eyelashes. She’s Moroccan, so in addition to speaking perfect Spanish and pretty good English, they speak Arabic at home. Lucky! Now, I don’t just like Selma because she’s a future super model. I really like her because she is painfully shy but secretly she is very, very smart. The room has to be silent to hear her whispered answers, but she always gets them right. I try to encourage her to talk, because I think she has good things to say.

My second favorite in Segundos is Ruben. Ruben is sort of like Andreis in that he is very sweet, always grinning, but a trouble maker and for that reason Marta doesn’t really like him. But I happen to know why he’s a trouble maker. He’s too smart. Marta will give them activities to do in their workbooks and I’ll walk around and check out the progress and Ruben is finished within ten seconds flat. That leaves him with five minutes with nothing to do except poke the kid in front of him or talk to someone across the aisle. He understands almost everything in English so I guess he doesn’t feel the need to pay attention. I’m not really sure how to solve this problem, but I’m working on it.

The jury’s still out for a favorite from Quintos. I’ll let you know.

I promise, my next post will not involve glue, tears, or children and will instead be about the fabulous culture, people, and places I’ve seen here. Also, I’m playing volleyball and doing an intercambio which are both fun. But seriously, these kids are sort of a highlight of life here.

Last thing: I learned how to say “to fart” in Spanish. Essential for being in an elementary school. In case you were wondering, it’s “tirarse un pedo”. Don’t get that confused with “estar pedo” or “agarrar pedo” which according to my volleyball coach, mean to be drunk and to get drunk.

Un besito!